20 INDIE MUSIC RULES

Disclaimer: this is not poetry, this is me venting about what i hate about my favorite music genre!

1. Must have wacky band name
2. Must be unable to differentiate artist from album titles to song titles
3. Albums must have strange and or hipster album artwork
4. Song lyrics must have unintelligible meanings
5. Singers must have strange, breathy voices
6. Songs must have odd chord progressions and multiple sections.
7. Songs must be 3:30 minimum, and an average of about 5:30
8. Artists must have eclectic dressing styles
9. Youtube videos must have 3 million hits or less
10. The artist must never be known
11. Song titles must allude to bygone eras or camping in the woods.
12. Male artists must have bushy beards
13. Female artists must prefer to wear their hair long and unkempt, with flowers.
14. A guitar must be used at least 4 times within an album.
15. The artist must choose an aesthetic vision in which to base everything they do.
16. Hard sounds must be used sparingly in songs
17. Every youtube video must have the top comment “thank you, sidebar”, or “Ive finally found that awesome side of youtube”.
18. There must be at least one lyric per song which the listener cannot understand.
19. The artist’s pronunciation must be painfully amateurish
20. The artist’s voice must vaguely remind you of someone else.